Some Christmas pix

Erik and Arden worshiping before Christmas dinner!

Mary Jill and Arden doing the "clap" they were doing at Trinity Chapel on the internet!

Slowly, some pictures are coming in from our Christmas celebration.

Christmas 2007

Pretty much the only "bad" thing about this Christmas is that my digital camera bit the dust on the 23rd...so, now I have to wait for my friends to send me some of their pictures so I can post them to my blog. For now, words will have to suffice!

What a FUN Christmas we had in Debrecen, Hungary. It's definitely one for the memory books. Erik, Sara (Swedish medical students) and I drove to Debrecen to stay with Mary Jill and Edith for the holidays! Sunday afternoon we went to a really cool Japanese restaurant where the food comes by each table on small plates along conveyor belts and you just take whatever you want to try! Then we walked downtown to see if there was a movie showing in English...no luck... so we spent very little time outside the house due to cold temps, and just lounged around, cooking, eating, watching movies at home, and laughing, laughing, laughing like crazy! I cannot remember the last time in my life when I laughed as hard, as long and as often as I laughed during these 5 days! We made such sweet memories together! God is good all the time!

Christmas 2007...Scripture God put on my heart...

"Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful." (Colossians 3:12-15)

This is an important season...for forgiveness. I cannot imagine wishing someone Merry Christmas if I have unforgiveness in my heart toward them. May we take the words above to heart this holiday season, recognize the amazing grace we have received and continually receive every moment of every day, and extend that same forgiveness and grace to every person in our lives, allowing the love of God to pour forth into every relationship.

First Christmas surprise for 2007

Marta and Arden!!! My wonderful Christmas surprise!!!!!

Sara, Erik, Mary Jill, Tibor and Kati at Pastor Ed and Sibyl's flat after church.

Greetings from Debrecen, Hungary, where it is cold and gray but warm and lovely in my friends' Mary Jill and Edith's home where I, Erik and Sara are spending this Christmas holiday!



We arrived Saturday just in time for church at the International Church of Debrecen. At one point during the service, Pastor Ed told everyone to stand up and mingle for a few minutes, at which time I, while sitting in the back, turned to see my friend MARTA come walking in the door!!!! What a miracle! Marta and I first met last February by God's divine appointment at the train station in Ukraine when MJ, my other friend Jenn and I were going there to do ministry. Marta was working at the Hungarian orphanage in Nagydobrony, Ukraine and we immediately had a "God connection".



Since last February, I'd made two more trips to the orphanage to see Marta and the girls there...but we'd not communicated nor met since last May. Tears came to both of our eyes as we hugged and hugged last night...she had only 10 minutes, but those10 minutes proved to be one of the best Christmas surprises I could ever ask for!

Oswald Chambers

"Never be sympathetic with a person whose situation causes you to conclude that God is dealing harshly with him. God can be more tender than we can conceive, and every once in a while He gives us the opportunity to deal firmly with someone so that He may be viewed as the tender One....People want the blessing of God, but they can't stand something that pierces right through to the heart of the matter.

If you are sensitive to God's way, your message as His servant will be merciless and insistent, cutting to the very root. Otherwise, there will be no healing...Deal with people where they are until they begin to realize their true need. Then hold high the standard of Jesus for their lives.

Jesus Christ came to "bring...a sword" through every kind of peace that is not based on a personal relationship with Himself."

As we celebrate what many people in my host country call "the holiday of love", I am reminded that the entire reason Jesus entered our fallen world was to bring the kind of love that would fully restore humanity to the Father. That love is not an 'ooey gooey' kind of sappy love full of hugs and kisses, but a heart-wrenching, life-giving, sacrificial, selfless, unconditional love that is willing to die...willing to lay one's life down for another. And then Jesus said something quite radical: "They will know you are my disciples by the way you love one another." He spoke difficult words for people to hear, but He loved them, unconditionally. He forgave. He accepted. He saw them as the Father sees them. And He still does that today through us, His followers.

Britain's Got Talent and thoughts on Jesus....

Many of you have probably already seen the video below from Britain's Got Talent. It was sent to me months ago, but I only opened it today. As you see the judges faces when this guy walks out on stage, you can see how "seriously" they take this guy upon outward appearances. "He had no comeliness that we should be attracted to Him...." is the verse that God dropped into my head upon watching this video. I have a student at school who, any time the name Jesus comes up, immediately rejects Him and the idea of taking Him seriously. She even laughs mockingly. In this video, it is only when this gentleman opens his mouth and begins to sing his song that every person in the place is humbled and amazed by the beauty. Likewise, we as believers, may not be "much to look at", but shouldn't it be, when we open our mouths to "sing" about our life in Jesus, that others are stunned by His beauty in our lives, and by His grace, and their views are radically changed about Him? Have a look. (You may have to cut and paste the link into your browser bar).

http://www.maniacworld.com/Phone-Salesman-Amazes-Crowd.html

Click Here: Check out "Phone Salesman Amazes Crowd - Paul Potts - Video"

Christian Educators Outreach Women's Retreat

The basilica in Esztergom at night!

Arden, Keri, Joanna, Laura and Lea, at the hospital!

Laci, Lea and Keri Nemeth as they wait for the newest little one to arrive!

Miracle of miracles...we found a weekend when nearly everyone connected to or friends with those of us in CEO were free to have a weekend get-a-way just before Christmas! Arden, Lea, Joanna, Keri and Laura all "escaped" our respective cities and retreated to Esztergom, a beautiful town on the Danube River, from which you can literally walk to Slovakia! (We didn't, but thought about it!) Of course we had grand plans to shop and visit the thermal baths, eat, talk, laugh, worship, etc., but the Lord had different plans. Keri, our dear Hungarian partner, is in hospital, due to an infection and the resulting affects it has had on her unborn baby, causing a high heart rate in the fetus. So, Lea, Joanna, Laura and I checked into our panzio on Saturday, went to lunch at a great little restaurant at the bottom of the castle's hill, then picked up cakes on the way to visit Keri in the hospital and hang out with her! What a BLESSED and wonderful time we all had just hanging out and chatting in Keri's hospital room for hours! Then we headed to the shop and bought "dinner" food items, returned to our panzio, enjoyed a smorgasbord for dinner and stayed up late talking, laughing and encouraging one another.

Today, after a wonderful breakfast, we made our way back to the hospital where we again hung out with Keri, got to see her hubby, Laci and their first little girl, Lea, and just enjoyed being together!

So while we didn't get to the baths, or see the basilica, or drive or walk across the bridge to Slovakia, we had a precious time hanging out and just being together! God is good all the time!

Friday at 7 - Christmas party!

FOOD!!!!!!

FELLOWSHIP!!!!

AND FUN!!!!

Great 2007 and looking forward to an even more blessed 2008!

We had our final meeting of Friday at 7 - International Christian Fellowship this past Friday evening and had our regular meeting plus a Christmas party with lots of food and drink! We sang some worship songs, then a couple of Christmas carols and then Jim gave a talk on the first part of John 4. Two new people showed up, one of whom saw our big sign which we have outside the church on the sidewalk each week and decided to come in! God has truly blessed the start of ICF and all of our meetings since the beginning of October! We look forward to what He wants to do in 2008 as we continue to seek Him and follow His leading alone! Blessings on YOU for praying for us!

Friends and babies

Yes, I love to kiss babies!

Aunt Agi, little Bori, and Gergely, with mom Bori hiding!

Little Gergely Attila!

Little Bori...finally smiles!

I visited my friend and hairdresser, Bori, today. Surprise visit, and got to meet her newest little one, Gergely Attila!!! He's 2 months old and on this visit, was awake! This precious little family is doing very well; Bori looks great although she didn't want any pictures taken of her due to lack of sleep; they will be needing a larger place very soon...all 4 of them, mom, dad and two kids share one bedroom. However, they don't complain...they have food, a roof overhead, clothes, family and friends. That's what matters!

One reason why I teach in Hungary

People here often ask me "Why do you stay here in Hungary?" One of the many reasons is pictured above. This is my 12a class...seniors, bilingual, and I've taught them for FOUR years! One of the blessings of teaching here is the fact that you start with a class in the 9th grade and you get to see them through all the way til they graduate! As you can see, it's a small group...we were missing one student today...and I've actually grown quite fond of these kids. We've had our ups and downs, our knock-down drag-outs, but it really struck me today just how much I've grown to love these students. We were finishing a Christmas story in class, and then I read them a poem called "The Touch of the Master's Hand", and nearly through tears, told them that each one of them is so incredibly valuable. Anyway, they are precious to me and I cannot believe we only have 4 more months together. I plan to make the most of every lesson with them!

Christmas trees in school and interesting discussions

Yep, THAT is a picture of a very large Christmas tree INSIDE our school! Public school...not private...wow, huh?

4 kids showed up today for our "open discussion" time...the main question discussed was what is the difference between all the different religions? Great time to lift up Jesus! They also asked me if I believe in reincarnation. Finally, my Catholic boy asked me what the Bible says about sex. So, it was an interesting conversation, to say the least!

Last 2 weeks of school in 2007

I enjoy the last two weeks of school before the Christmas holiday. The blessings of being a "conversational English teacher" include being able to talk freely about Christmas...and in that, one is able to talk about EVERYTHING connected to Christmas, including Jesus. This week, we're reading non-traditional Christmas stories in most of my classes, all of which lead to neat discussions about things like reconciliation and restoration, good vocabulary words as well for 2nd language learners. Next week, the guitar will be attached to my neck as we'll sing Christmas carols in all my classes. It's really nice not to have to "watch my step" in this public school like I would have to in the U.S.A., where the idea of freedom of speech is simply not true when it comes to speaking about Christmas. I pray the freedoms here remain so that the Truth of this season can go forward to many young people who need the hope that only God can give!

More pix from Christmas party!

Robi and Erika sampling the appetizers and drinks!

Judit and Gabi just camped out in the kitchen with the plethora of food!

Erika and Arden....say cheese!

We have lots of left-overs from the party this year...which I haul to school on Monday, and we again, enjoy them during the day!

18th Annual Deak English Dept. Christmas Party

Maria, Laci, Melinda, Kati and Mari at my place enjoying yummy food!

Maria Horvath and Arden!

My wonderful friend and Hungarian teacher, Kati!

Melinda, Kati, Mari, Krisztina and Gabi.

Yep, we've been having English Department Christmas parties for 18 years at Deak! Each year, the "native English teacher" hosts it...so that's been me for the past 8 years! I love it! We always have so much fun playing at least one or two games, and choosing and stealing gifts, and EATING!!! Everyone brings a dish and a drink and we just hang out and talk, laugh, and enjoy being together outside of school! I think we are the only department in the school with such a party and rich tradition! This year we had only 12...much smaller than in previous years, but it was actually really nice...much more intimate. I'm so thankful for such wonderful colleagues!

We need each other.....

Here are some thoughts from a devotional which I believe are very important; it seems basic, but for those of us living and serving overseas, we really need those of you "back home" in the ways that this man expresses, largely because we do not have the same "resources" you all have, whether it is materials or more significantly, personal contact/fellowship. I'm so thankful for those God has placed and is placing in my life...

The Apostle Paul said we are to "work out our own salvation with fear and trembling." (Philippians 2:12) That doesn't mean our salvation is based on works or on what I do. Salvation is the free gift of God and there is nothing you or I can do to earn it or deserve it.

What that verse means is that you and I are responsible for our own spiritual growth. Your pastor is not responsible for your spiritual growth. You are. Your Sunday School or small group leader is not responsible for your spiritual growth. You are. Your spouse is not responsible for you growing in the Lord - that's your job!

Here's the good news: While you are ultimately responsible for your own spiritual growth, you don't have to do it by yourself. In fact, you can't do it by yourself. You need the instruction, encouragement, edification and insight of others in order to become all that God intends you to be. There are things you don't know, experiences you haven't had, mistakes you haven't made and insights you haven't yet gleaned from the Word, and you need others to share these thing with you.

Have you seen the commercial where a doctor is trying to talk a patient through surgery on the phone? "Now make a 3-inch incision just above the forth rib..." the surgeon says as the perplexed patient is sitting at his kitchen table holding a butter knife. "Shouldn't you be doing this?" the patient asks. The commercial uses that outrageous scenario to make the point that there are some things that we just can't do for ourselves. Let's face it: when it comes to seeing ourselves honestly, we are not qualified. We tend to either see ourselves as better than we actually are or we are too hard on ourselves and see ourselves as less than we really are.

Robert Burns, the renowned Scottish poet once wrote, "O the gift that God would give us, to see ourselves as others see us." He's right, you know. It is very, very difficult for us to objective about ourselves. For that reason, we need those who know us best and love us most to help us in process of becoming the man or woman of God that He intends for us to be. Who are those people in your life? Are you leaning on them for advice, support and encouragement? Are you asking them to make sure aware of "blind spots" in your life that can hinder your growth or compromise your witness? You need them to grow in your walk with the Lord! Rev. Alan Riley

Friend....

I'm very, very thankful for this young lady pictured above. God has given me this woman, Sara, as a friend, prayer warrior buddy, and someone to laugh with too! God's provisions are quite wonderful!

ICF December

Marlo and MJ!

Jim, Tanya, Jennifer, Sara, Erik and Judit.....in response to "everyone look here and say "hi"!"

Marlow giving Erik a prophetic word.

MJ, Arden and Tanya!

We had another smaller turnout this evening at ICF. Maybe it's because students are studying for exams...but it turned out to be a good meeting and very different than usual. Yes, we had worship, and fellowship, but we put John's gospel on hold....

MaryJill's friend and pastor from New York, Marlow, was visiting, and he did a bit of teaching on the prophetic...and demonstrated what it looks like. A number of people were encouraged by the words and the prayers they received.

Erik did a great job of leading worship, and in the end, we were having to "clear people out" to lock up just before 10 p.m.! Our last meeting for 2007 will be next Friday and we're gonna have pizza and a Christmas party!

Christmas in Szeged

Concert...featuring a very famous flaotist as well as a cellist from the Budapest opera...seated on the right.
Tusi and Arden, after the concert. Tusi plays violin in the local orchestra!

This says: "Happy Christmas" and is on the front of the City Hall building here in Szeged!!!

These are the lights going down Karasz utca, our "walking street" downtown. You can just see the lights on the big Christmas tree in the middle of the square on the far right of the picture in the distance!

Yes indeedy, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas around the city! Lots of concerts, lights, hot-spiced wine, and Christmas markets! Tonight, I was invited to a symphonic orchestral concert during which they played a truly Adventi song as well as Vivaldi's Four Seasons. (Eat your heart out Foley). Afterwards, I took a stroll downtown, and yes, the "Happy Christmas" lights are on the CITY HALL building! (You won't see THAT in the U.S.A. anymore, sadly). December is definitely a month to celebrate and engage in lots of fun Christmasy activities here in Europe!

Christmas gifts from ICF tithe

At ICF, the leadership team decided that this month's tithe would be spent on two kids. Klaudia, age 10 and her brother, Janos, age 8, are children who live with their mother in the battered women's shelter. A local foundation is sponsoring a Christmas program where people can either donate money to buy gifts that each child wants or actually buy those gifts for the children. We at ICF decided to go ahead and buy the gifts. In the above picture you can see the doll, hairbrush and comb and wrapped book of tales for Klaudia and the cool car and book of tales for Janos! Thank you ICF folks who give, for making it possible to bless these children this Christmas!

Christmas in Hungary

Next week, I'll post a picture of the Christmas tree that is up in our school. Yes, a CHRISTMAS TREE in a public high school! In fact, on December 20th, we'll be having the annual SCHOOL CHRISTMAS PARTY, which involves classes and teachers performing various funny, serious, dramatic and vocal skits, songs, scenes, and choruses! Yes, people sing and talk about Jesus! Yes, I'll be singing a song I wrote this summer which clearly talks about God's love.

You see, as I've blogged in year's past, here in Europe, they separate Santa and Jesus. In fact, tomorrow is Mikulas Day here in Hungary...i.e. Santa Claus day, and children get chocolates and small gifts from Santa. The one who brings the presents on December 24th? You guessed it: Jesus!

Conversation

I had the first "unofficial serious topic" conversation with 4 of my 9th graders on Tuesday. I'm amazed by the seriousness of their questions...15 year olds thinking about life, death, God, church teachings vs. what the Bible actually teaches, luck, blessings, atheism. This was a voluntary meeting for them...they could have been hanging out with their classmates during their free period, but they chose to come talk with me. They choose the questions and I'm very excited to see how this unfolds in the coming months!

More on inflation

I'm "stealing" this info from another blog.

Petrol, that's gasoline for Americans, now costs $6.25/gallon here in Hungary!

Prices of utilities increased 20%.

Life is challenging...but God is able!

Inflation

I just browsed over to a friend's blog where he outlines the rising costs of things here in Hungary. To add my "2 cents" worth to the discussion, I heard that a report was published recently about inflation in european union countries. Inflation this past year was at about 4% (if I remember correctly) across each country in the EU...however, in Hungary, inflation was 13%! Can you imagine the outrage of the Hungarian people, as well as the desperation so many are facing as salaries in the public sector are not increasing at all.

My friends in Debrecen said that burglaries (i.e. break-ins to people's homes and thefts) are SO bad right now that a call that went into the police about a break-in at 8 a.m. was only responded to by 8 p.m. that night because the police were having to respond to so many other break-ins! And, in this particular break-in, the theives left their MATCHES behind...these thieves cannot even afford a flashlight?

People are getting desperate, and as the dollar falls...it's down now to 173 Forints to $1.....from 216 just a year ago.....those who are dependent upon dollars are also feeling the tremendous pinch. God is our provider; pray for those who do not know Him to come to know Him because otherwise, life is growing increasingly bleak for them.

More from the Sacred Romance

I finally finished The Sacred Romance. Good book...a bit wordy, but I was able to dig through that to find some neat kernels which hit my heart in particular at this point in my journey.

"Satan's seduction of our heart always comes in the form of a story that offers us greater control through knowing good and evil rather than the unknowns of relationship."

"Not realizing it is a journey of the heart that is called for, we make a crucial mistake. We come to a place in our spiritual life where we hear God calling us. we know he is calling us to give up the less-wild lovers that have become so much a part of our identity, embrace our nakedness, and trust in his goodness."

"Whatever the object of our addiction is, it attaches itself to our intense desire for eternal and intimate communion with God and each other in the midst of Paradise---the desire that Jesus himself placed in us before the beginning of the world. Nothing less than this kind of unfallen communion will ever satisfy our desire or allow it to drink freely without imprisoning it and us."

"Our lovers have so intertwined themselves with our identity that to give them up feels like personal death. Indeed, they have kept us from knowing the emptiness of our heart's cup. We wonder if it is possible to survive without them.....
But we who would be born again indeed,
Must wake our souls unnumbered times a day
And urge ourselves to life with holy greed.
Now open our bosoms to the wind's free play,
And now, with patience forceful, hard, lie still
Submiss and ready to the making will,
Athirst and empty, for God's breath to fill."

Any thoughts out there????

Friday at 8?????

Because of a "conflict" of events in the room where ICF usually meets, we had our Friday at 7 meeting at 8 yesterday evening...we believe, as a result of the change of time, numbers were down. In total, including 5 on leadership team, we had 15 show up, but it was still a very, very blessed time in the Lord. I led the worship and Edith spoke on the last verses in chapter 3 of John's gospel.

We were very excited to try out our new/used mixer, which we'd just gotten from the States through a generous donation. Well, as we plugged it in to the transformer and turned it on, sadly, it began to smoke...so we quickly turned it off, and we are hoping and praying that it's not "toasted". We still had our shakers, and djembe (drum) and a brand new tamborine...so our musical instruments section is growing!

One young lady who had not been there for about a month showed up at 7 and wanted to know how she could help. Agi is studying to be a pharmacist and is in her first year at the medical university. She is a sweet young lady and asked, at the end, if we might need another guitar player as she plays, "a bit". We're excited about how people are starting to ask how they can be more involved.

We are tithing off of the offerings we receive each week, and this month we have "adopted" a brother and a sister, who live with their mother in the battered women's shelter...we are "allowed" to spend about $30 on each of them for Christmas and we're excited to buy them the gifts they really want! Klaudia has asked for a baby doll, a hairbrush and comb, and a story book. Her brother, Janos (John) has asked for a big truck and a story book.

Sorry no pictures...my camera stayed in its bag, but my friend Edith has said she will send a picture or two from her camera once she downloads them onto her computer. We have just 2 more meetings before the Christmas holidays, so we are hoping many come and hear the Good News that Jesus loves them!!!!

Sunbeams

I started roller-blading yesterday...I dug out the very nice pair of skates my brother helped me to buy probably 7 years ago, and which I'd probably used 3 times. There is a wonderful "new" road which runs alongside the river that runs through our city and walkers, bikers, runners and roller-bladers, along with the occasional car, use this road. It's very peaceful and a great place to "get away" without getting away.

Today, as I was blading, I turned around and saw this incredible picture with the sun, slowly setting. I took this with my phone's camera and was blown away by the beams! It reminded me of how far-reaching is the love and grace of God.

The Sacred Romance

I've been reading a very good book called The Sacred Romance by Brent Curtis and John Eldredge. Here are some quotes to ponder...you know me, I love quotes.

"It is in our heart that we first hear the voice of God and it is in the heart that we come to know him and learn to live in his love."

"For above all else, the Christian life is a love affair of the heart. It cannot be lived primarily as a set of principles or ethics."

"There are only two things that pierce the human heart, wrote Simone Weil. One is beauty. The other is affliction."

"Whether we feel it with finality...or as a lingering fear in the corner of our minds, most of us sense that we are alone in the world. No one has ever been there for us with the strength, tenderness, and consistency that we long for. Even in the best situations, people eventually let us down. Our personal drama leaves us little hope for an Author who is taking the story toward a good conclusion. Chesterton said we're certain to minsunderstand the story we find ourselves in and he was right. Furthermore, those closest to us often help in the misinterpretation."

"We long for intimacy because we were made in the image of perfect intimacy."

"Jesus left to prepare our place in heaven; the Spirit has come to empower us to continue the invasion of the kindgom, which is primarily about freeing the hearts of others to live in the love of God."

....to be continued.....

Weekend photos....

newly renovated "palace"

Don't worry....

Just some photos for you to enjoy...and comment on if you want!

Thanksgiving Dinnerssssssss........and Szeged fun!

Unlike last year, I didn't cook a turkey this year. However, I got to enjoy not just one, but two wonderful Thanksgiving dinners. The first was Saturday night...a local church congregation here, Cornerstone, had its annual Thanksgiving outreach feast! Probably 150 people were there, about 50 kids, and while most were believers, there were some who were not and got to hear the Gospel and eat traditional Thanksgiving foods!

Sunday, Edith, Mary Jill and I drove to Budapest and attended the International Church of Budapest, after which we joined about 55 other people at a retreat center for another Thanksgiving feast celebration, with cranberry sauce to boot! That was a sweet time of fun, fellowship, worship, and great food!

Saturday afternoon, MJ, Edith and I walked around Szeged and of course happened upon my favorite statue...you simply cannot walk past this forlorn looking girl and not sit down next to her to have your photo taken.

More ICF pix.....

Putting our best feet forward.....

We're filling up the chairs we set out.....

Friday at 7 - International Christian Fellowship.....

The leadership teams' "true colors" are starting to show after 2 months of meetings....two weeks ago, we arrived to find a "clothing bazaar" taking place in the room where we meet...and I was speaking on Jesus cleansing the temple. Sort of ironic. Well, this week, Erik, pictured above found a hat that was a keeper, and a "gown" that was not a keeper. He and Sara also decided to try their hand at synchronized head stands...and all this before our meeting started. Mary Jill, Elza, Edith and Judit and I just looked on and laughed.

In all seriousness, we had 29 in attendance this past Friday and it was a blessed time of fun praise and worship and an excellent message by Erik on the first section of John 3. I had a wonderful discussion with Markus, a young man from Germany, for probably an hour after the meeting. He is searching and so hungry to know God.

We have three meetings remaining before the Christmas holiday break! We hope to organize a Christmas party on one of those Fridays. Our November tithe has gone to a 10 year old little girl, who lives with her mother in the battered women's shelter...we've bought her Christmas gifts that she requested: a baby doll, a comb and hairbrush, and a story book.

Oswald Chambers

Some powerful thoughts to ponder and take to the Lord.

"Our state of mind is powerful in its effects. It can be the enemy that penetrates right into our soul and distracts our mind from God. There are certain attitudes we should never dare to indulge. If we do, we will find they have distracted us from faith in God.

Another thing that distracts us is our passion for vindication. St. Augustine prayed, "O Lord, deliver me from this lust of always vindicating myself." Such a need for constant vindication destroys our soul's faith in God. Don't say, "I must explain myself, " or "I must get people to understand." Our Lord never explained anything---He left the misunderstandings or misconceptions of others to correct themselves.

When we discern that other people are not growing spiritually and allow that discernment to turn to criticism, we block our fellowship with God. God never gives us discernment so that we may criticize, but that we may intercede."

HIS doors of opportunity, not mine

I'd prayed since last Friday, after having learned about the 17 year old student from our school who took his own life, that I might be able to talk about it in some of my classes and share about having a true and lasting hope. Monday passed...the topic came up in a couple of my 5 classes, but no ensuing discussions...Tuesday, the same...Wednesday...the same, til the last 5 minutes of my LAST lesson with my 9th graders. However, the topic was not suicide, but rather whether there is such thing as luck. I "argued" that there is no such thing as luck, that there are only blessings! Well, if you have any familiarity with 15 year olds, they will argue with you like a cat cornered.

Our "discussion" was more of a heated debate, which turned, of course to the Author of blessings...in whom only 1 of the 7 students remaining to take part in the discussion believes. So then we begin to argue about the existence of God...the typical arguments of "we can't see Him", "if you believe that then He is real for you, but if I don't, then He is not real," etc. Quite honestly, from my perspective, it was NOT a pretty sight, with some raised voices and bantering back and forth...BUT GOD. Quite suddenly, I knew the Holy Spirit had descended upon the room, our group and the conversation, and His peace and calmness and love took over. I was able to get to the heart of the matter...there is a God who loves each of us passionately and endlessly and wants a personal relationship with each one of us....at this point, each of these students who had been "at a distance" moved in closer to me and began to "hear" His love, as I told them how I fail miserably every day at loving Him and loving others. The questions then turned to, "Well, how do you know you are hearing His voice?" "How do you know that He is telling you to go and love that particular person?" Then one boy gave this scenario: "My dad had cancer and my mom prayed and prayed and prayed that he would get healed and he died anyway. How do you explain that God is a God of love when He allows that?" I told him that his question is excellent and yet we didn't have time to discuss it, but I want to discuss it, so definitely next week we will sit down and talk about that! ALL of them said, "OK, in the next lesson, let's talk about this!!!" There was an excitement in all of us...it's like the Holy Spirit showed up and wanted to declare Himself Lord over our silly arguments and bring in His Love.

This was not the door of opportunity I had "planned", but it was God's, and I pray that He will again, pave the way next week for more outpourings of His love into these young people's hearts. At the end of our discussion, I could see how incredibly hungry these young people are to know a love like I was talking about...keep that door open, Lord!

Simon revelation

My cat Simon has an open wound on his side...he'd had another wound there about 2 weeks ago, but it had healed...I thought...now it is gaping again and I must play doctor and keep it clean, etc. When I try to put medicine on it, Simon immediately jumps up and starts licking the wound again. Last night after I put the betadine on it, I began to stroke Simon's head and neck and just love on him. I was sort of "holding him down", with the purpose of having the betadine soak in and do its bacterial killing thing before Simon licked it all off. As I sat there, purposefully stroking his head and neck, he began to purr loudly...I knew I had to continue loving on him and doing everything within my power to let him know that he didn't need to be afraid, and what I was doing TO him in putting medicine on his wound was the best thing FOR him. Yet, while sitting there just loving on Him, with "my" ulterior motives, a deep love "connection" happened and a renewed trust between us seemed to rise up and take hold. Simon stopped trying to "break free" from my gentle grip and just let me love on him.

I was struck with a revelation that this is so much like how God deals with us. We've got major wounds, sometimes they are open and needing "treatment" by the Great Physician...and that treatment is not always pleasant; but in the middle of the treatment, our loving heavenly Daddy is all the time gently, lovingly, warmly stroking our head and heart, letting us know it's gonna be ok, and "I'm doing this for your good...you have to trust me that it is better for you that you don't continue to lick away at this wound, reopening it and letting it ooze, but rather that you let me apply the balm, the healing salve, so it can heal and you can be healthy again. In the meantime, I'm just gonna keep loving on you, passionately, purposefully, and always because that is Who I am." And when we willingly yield to His loving strokes, that intimacy between us is strengthened.

In the midst of our pain, do we know and feel the loving strokes of our heavenly Daddy? Maybe we simply need to sit in His presence, under His gentle hand and let Him love on us!

Rain, cat fights and suicide

Well, after days of rain and light snow, with puddles everywhere, I'm sort of wishing that it would all go over to Georgia in the U.S. where they desperately need the water! The rain has kept lots of people inside, because it is also very COLD, and my cats as well. Cooped up, they've got some energy inside, so when I let them out this morning, Toby immediately picked a fight with the neighbor cat who frequents our yard when my boys are not in the yard. Not a pretty sound to hear at 6 a.m.

So far this is a very different winter than last year...we were still in shirt sleeves this time last year, and now we are in winter coats, gloves and hats. Seems strange to have two so very different years...but then again, there's lots of upheaval going on everywhere, not only physically, but spiritually...God is shaking things up, shifting things, moving, stripping, cleansing, breaking, molding, remaking, and forming His children. Will we welcome His work?

This will be a very different holiday season for one family at my school. Last Thursday night, an 11th grader took his own life, the day before his birthday. No note, no indications...in fact, he'd started to become much more extroverted and friendly with classmates and others in the past 6 months. Unlike my cats, who took out their pent up frustrations on another cat, this young man took his out on himself, leaving many to wonder 'why'? I pray that in these next few days God gives me the opportunity to share with students about hope in Jesus!

A smattering of thoughts to ponder...

Of course, from Oswald Chambers:

"We should battle through our moods, feelings and emotions into absolute devotion to the Lord Jesus. We must break out of our own little world of experience into abandoned devotion to Him."

"All of our fears are sinful, and we create our own fears by refusing to nourish ourselves in our faith. How can anyone who is identified with Jesus Christ suffer from doubt or fear?"

"Our human relationships are the very conditions in which the ideal life of God should be exhibited."

"Abraham, at this point (Gen. 22:16-17), has reached the point where he is in touch with the very nature of God. He now understands the reality of God. 'My goal is God Himself...At any cost, dear Lord, by any road....' means submitting to God's way of bringing us to the goal."

"The promises of God are of no value to us until, through obedience, we come to understand the nature of God."

First Snow in Szeged

Yep, we awoke to the first snow in Szeged this morning! These shots are taken out my bedroom window looking into the back yard of the building where I live, and into the neighbor's yard too. I LOVE the first snow, and last year, I think it came in January, so this is a real treat! They say you can take the girl out of Colorado, but you cannot take Colorado out of the girl! I MISS snow and mountains. If this "early onset" of winter is any indication of what winter will be like this year, maybe we'll get a lot of snow! As my friend Jo wrote in her blog...they got snow in Budapest on Sunday...everything seems much quieter with a blanket of snow covering it.

For me, this blanketing is a tangible picture of God's covering...He wraps Himself around us, covering us with His wings where we can hide and be safe, and it is in this quiet place with Him that everything comes into perspective because we are seeing things from His point of view.

Films

I love watching movies. Even moreso, I love going out afterwards and talking about them, if they are the kind that warrant discussion. This afternoon, two dear friends of mine and I saw the Jodie Foster film...don't know the title in English... where she "snaps" after she and her fiance were attacked in Central Park in New York City one night. Essentially, without ruining the film, she takes things into her own hands, and her "second self" emerges.
As Barb, Lari and I sat and talked about it afterwards, we all agreed that it is quite frightening to know that what happened to Jodie Foster's character is a latent potential in all of us. Every one of us could do exactly what she did---that is the true heart of a person---outside of Christ and outside of the grace of God!
The film does not offer any hope. The only hope lies in those who come out of the film and ponder the reality of our fallenness, how we need to care for each other, especially during the really hard times, and the absolute necessity of the Gospel in a broken world that offers no hope. Without God, as this film clearly depicts, the writer of Ecclesiastes is absolutely right: everything is meaningless.

The gang was all here!

We had the entire leadership team for Friday at 7 - International Christian Fellowship here on Friday! It was really, really good to be together again, and on a rainy, chilly Friday night, we had about 23 total come to ICF. Two more new faces, one of those from Romania.

Jim spoke on the first section of John 2, where Jesus turns water to wine at the wedding at Cana! It was really good and at the end, when he asked if there were people who wanted to be even more filled up with God, nearly everyone in the room came forward, and Jim and Mary Jill prayed for each one! Jim also had the chance to spend about an hour after the meeting talking one on one with a young man from Germany, who has been faithfully attending. Precious young man who has many questions and is truly searching for God! Pray that the Holy Spirit meets him with His tender love and gentleness, and draws him to Himself.

Because the Person family was driving home to Budapest Friday night, the leadership team went to Burger King, a stone's throw from where we meet, and had our team meeting! We are blessed in so many amazing ways!